How To Deal With A Controlling Ex-spouse
If ??m?one has shown them??lves to be ? controlling person, chances are theyre n?t going to change overnight. Manipulating oth?r? i? a very hard habit to break.
But th?r? ?s hope! Rather than waiting around f?r y?ur ex t? change, h?r? ?re s?m? things th?t YOU ?an do to cope with and ultimately snuff out th?ir controlling influence ?n your life:
Tip #1: Call Your Ex ?n Their Controlling Behavior
The best w?y to put a stop t? controlling behavior ?s to call it what ?t ?s when it happens.
The next time ?our ex does ?r s?ys s?mething that ?ou feel ?s controlling or manipulative, ?ou n?ed t? call a spade ? spade and tell him or h?r th?t ?ou ?ee what h? ?r she ?s trying to d? and th?t they ?ann?t manipulate ?ou ?nto getting th?ir w?y anymore.
Better yet, remind ?our ex that th?s behavior ?s what played ?n important role in th? break up of ?our marriage, and that ?ou h?ve z?ro tolerance f?r ?t ?n ?our life g?ing forward. The marriage ?s ?ver ?nd ?o ?s th? controlling behavior.
Set boundaries. Tell ?our ex th?t unl?s? and unt?l they are willing to examine th?ir behavior ?nd treat ?ou w?th respect, ?ou would prefer n?t to ?ee him or her.
Tip #2: Stick t? Your Guns
Once youve told your ?x that ?ou h?ve zero tolerance f?r th?ir controlling behavior and have set ?our boundaries ?n how ?ou want to be treated, d? not back down!
By th?ir very nature, chances ?re ?our ex w?ll try to manipulate ?ou ?nto feeling badly ?bout setting the?e boundaries. Do not listen! This ?s simply m?re of the same, and ?ou deserve better.
Stick to your guns ?nd put ?ours?lf ?nd ?our desire t? b? treated w?th respect first.
Tip #3: Put Space b?tween You ?nd Your Ex
If ?ou can, cons?der g?ing ?wa? for ? week, ?r ?ven a m?re extended period of time if possible. Removing yourself physically ?s a great w?y t? break ties w?th ?our ex and ?t w?ll al?o give you time t? grow stronger w?thin yourself. If money ?s ?n issue, ??ns?der g?ing t? see family ?r friends who live out of town.
This m?y be hard to do, but ?f ?our ex ?s very controlling, ?t m?y b? ?ne of th? b?st ways to deal w?th th? situation. The time ?way w?ll give ?ou time t? focus on YOU and will be ? red flag t? ?our ex that th? two of you ?re no longer ?n a relationship.
The m?re time ?part the b?tter the chances th?t when ?ou return ?ou will not have to deal with this behavior.
Tip #4: When All Else Fails, Get Help
If ?our exs controlling behavior ?s t? the point th?t ?ou feel ?ou are ?n danger, ?ou may h?ve to seek ?utsid? h?lp from ?our local police department.
Some people have a hard time accepting that a relationship ?s over. If ?our ex ?s ?ne of th?se people and he ?r she continuously calls you, shows up at your home or workplace, ?r even starts threatening you with harm or ?a?ing theyll harm themselves, chances ?re ?ou will n?ed to get help.
Reach ?ut if ?ou need t? put ?our safety first!
Its an inevitable part ?f life that relationships end, ?nd s?me ?f th?se separations ?re rockier th?n others.
But remember ?ts b?tter t? b? ?lone th?n t? be in a relationship that makes ?ou feel unhappy! A controlling, manipulative person do?s n?t change their stripes overnight, ?nd you n?ed to cut this unhealthy behavior ?ut of ?our life if ?ou are to move on ?nd be happy.
from How to Get Your Ex Back - Make Ex Want You Back http://ift.tt/12UVRCG
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