How to Make Your Relationship Stronger

It takes two. This is a great truth about relationships, perhaps the greatest of all truths. If you are involved with a partner who takes no interest in or responsibility for the other half of your relationship, then read no further and simply move on, no matter how much it hurts. If. on the other hand, there is reason to believe that your partner is willing to try to help strengthen your relationship, then there are some steps you can take that will bolster your half of the relationship while at the same time encouraging your partner to reciprocate.

The Beatles were wrong - love is not all you need, although it is certainly essential. The other two essential ingredients are respect and trust. The first steps necessary to strengthen respect and trust in your relationship are fairly straightforward. If you want to build mutual trust, then be trustworthy. If you want to build mutual respect, then be respectful and be respectable. But the devil, as they say, is in the details.

Try this - promise yourself that for an entire month you will be completely honest with your partner about everything. This is even more difficult than it sounds, because in order for it to work you must only avoid telling lies, but also find the courage to speak the whole truth about your ultimate intentions and motivations. This will require some deep soul-searching on your part because, like all other human beings, the person you are most likely to lie to is yourself. You will know you are on the right track if you uncover a truth about yourself that makes you squirm with discomfort. Once you have discovered a truth like this, confess it to your partner. An example of such a confession might be, "A lot of my self-sacrificing behavior towards you is motivated not so much by an unselfish desire to make you happy, but rather by a selfish desire to make you love me, so I can be happy."

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